A couple of years ago, I found myself at a place where I was always so tired and I had no desire to do the things that I normally loved to do. I felt anxious and overwhelmed and like the world was falling down all around me. I’m not at all trying to make light of those who struggle with depression, because I know it’s real. I take care of my mom who is clinically depressed, so I understand, but when I realized those three things are symptoms of depression, I said to myself, “Nope, I don’t have time to be depressed.” I also had no time for LIFE, but I didn’t even know where to make the time to have one.
The feeling of being overwhelmed and anxious all the time soon got VERY old for me. I had been married for three blissful years, but date night did not excite me anymore. I had an amazing job helping people, but I had no desire to help people. I loved to cook, craft and blog, but I wasn’t enjoying those things either.
One evening I was really struggling with enjoying my down time with my husband and he noticed. He made dinner that night and after we were done eating he said, “This weekend I want you to do something that you WANT to do. Why don’t you start crocheting again? Why don’t you blog anymore? I want you to make time for YOU to do what makes you happy.” My first response was, “But I have this meeting that I need to be at on Saturday…” He stopped me and said, “No, you’re not going to that meeting. I need you to focus on you. I need you to focus on taking care of you.”
After dinner, I sulked and then I went to bed thinking, “How did I get here?”
When I woke up the next day, I went to work and then came home and decided that I was going to make a list of the things that made me feel happy. It wasn’t a very long list…
1. Spending quality-time with my husband
2. Cooking
3. Blogging
4. Feeding other people
5. Mani’s & Pedi’s
6. Watching Hallmark movies
I’m a pretty busy gal so trying to get creative about where I was going to plug some of these things in was going to be very interesting.
The first one was easy and we do this pretty faithfully- The Mister and I decided that we were going to have a weekly date night. If we couldn’t afford to go out weekly, we would make dinner at home and watch a show together.
Cooking, well that comes easily but time didn’t always allow for it. Of course, if we couldn’t afford to go out to eat, that meant I would need to cook- so got that one covered.
Blogging- well, here we are
Feeding other people- My circle of friends is often very busy too, so The Mister and I try to host friends when we can. Having a full house always makes my heart feel full.
Of these SIX things, my mental health day usually consists of going to get a mani and/or a pedi, my eyebrows waxed and then going home and watching a pre-recorded Hallmark movie with a large glass of iced La Croix. Yes, I pre-record them- I love whoever invented the DVR. It is a busy girl’s best friend!
At first, I only did this monthly, but I have learned how to slay my schedule and manage my time better. At least once a week, I sit down and watch a sappy Hallmark flick with my La Croix and monthly, I get a mani/pedi.
I have also learned that I have to take care of me. If I’m a mess, I can’t help anyone.
All that to say, do it- find what makes you happy and do it! We all have lives and we can’t do these things everyday but knowing what makes you happy certainly gives you something to look forward to.
~Mrs Galvan~
You are right that we need to find our happy place and keep doing that. However much busy work keeps us, we need to feel our hearts and mind the best. Loved your honest post. May you progress from here on.
Parul, Thank you! <3
Leslie, what a great advise! i know it seems like a given but many people forget, or feel guilty, to just do “me things” or whatever is that makes each one of us happy.
Glad you found your rock!
Paula
Paula, thank you! And thanks for reading 🙂